The Old T-shirt Test

I never believe when people say I look thinner than the last time they saw me. So every once in a while when I receive quite a number of it, I would put myself to a test. The almost ultimate test: The old T-shirt test.

The test is simple. I would put on the clothes I used to buy/wear before I grow expand to the new size. It is pretty tricky with old T-shirts though. The T-shirt will usually stretch after many washes, so to be fair I usually change a few times, trying a few clothes out to see if I really look different.

Just now I did that again. I couldn't find my old T-shirt from my Pre-U year (the T-shirt stretches over the years, probably a bit too large for the almost ultimate test) so I grabbed another T-shirt slightly smaller than it. I believe the T-shirt is slightly smaller than the one I wore a lot back then in Pre-U college and it doesn't stretch much thanks to the cheap material the factory is using. The passing mark is when I can fit into the T-shirt without looking "extremely desperate" or at least "desperate" trying to fit in a small T-shirt.

And the result is... (drum roll)

I passed!

And it was pretty scary. I can wear the T-shirt without having to see any unnecessary flesh (plus fat) trying to squeeze itself out near to the fabric.

And how could that be scary?

Try piling up lots of pounds throughout the years (I gained 15 kg in 4 years with lots of ups and very little downs) and losing (almost all of) them in a couple of months (and a little bit more). And you know that you're not losing them in the healthy way. THAT is the scary part.

I managed to squeeze in a T-shirt slightly smaller than the one I bought 5 years ago, and it really looked like back then: me in my small T-shirt. Now I believe why people said I'm a lot thinner than before.

I still need to lose some weight (plus fat) from the waist down. *sigh*

CHEATER!!!

I cheat.

I can't believe I am actually going to do this again. I play Pokemon Crystal with GameShark cheat codes. It's fantastic. My first try is catching Totodile. I chose Chikorita at the beginning of the game so getting a Totodile or Cyndaquil is impossible throughout the game unless if I can trade the Pokemon, which is impossible too, because I am using ROM emulator, not the real device. So cheating is the only way to get them in my Pokedex.

I cheat only to catch the Pokemon, not to win any battles with cheat code-raised Pokemon. Where's the fun in playing the game then? My next goal is to catch a few Eevee so I can use different stones on them and have many different evolution. The next? Catching the three legendary dogs. I came across one in the grass earlier but it fled and it will probably be impossible to be found again, so cheating comes in handy. I can cheat with using lots of Masterball, but I prefer the traditional way. Hehe...

Happy cheating gaming!

Note: This is more like a compensation because I had caught and raised some of my Pokemon to a certain level and somehow the game I saved is lost! I don't feel very bad cheating in the game. :P

Road to Anorexia

I have been getting quite some "Oh, you look thin" for the past few days. This afternoon I got three people saying the same thing. Two of them said I look a lot thinner. A LOT. I was already 'thinner' when they saw me two months back, but now I'm "thinner than that."

I am not on a diet. And I am not sick. So nobody should worry about me.

I am not dieting. But I have to admit I eat very little now. I can't tolerate a huge amount of food in one sitting without feeling sick afterwards. I am in my "not hungry" period where I can go without food for the whole day or two without complaining "I'm hungry."

I eat less food than usual. I used to eat the same amount my roommates eat - combined. I was a big eater. I used to eat as much as my *lalala...* is eating, and sometimes more. And he eats a lot. Now I can only eat a quarter or less than that.

My appetite was greatly reduced when I was down with fever about a week ago. I didn't eat real food that day. Yesterday I ate 5 pieces of prunes, 4 white bread and a cup of instant cream of chicken soup. The day before yesterday and the day before that I ate two pieces of tuna sandwiches for each day. I am not talking about jumbo-sized sandwiches. Spicy tuna flakes on plain white bread, garnished with some tomato and salad. And I have a medium-sized dark chocolate bar sitting in my bag waiting patiently to be eaten since a few weeks ago.

I am a lot thinner than before, and my stomach is refusing food. A whole lot thinner and I'll be anorexic. I am forcing myself to eat more and more everyday, only to end up feeling bloated and not very well after each meal, or sometimes throwing up whatever thing that is available in my empty stomach. Ouch.

I am fighting it. But fighting requires a lot of energy and will. And I lack both. I am hanging on with whatever that is left in me to survive.

I am not going to be anorexic.